Scéalta – The Early Childhood Ireland Blog

< Back to Blog

Relationships – Relax, Relate, Communicate

By: MILICA ATANACKOVIC

Tuesday 27 September 2016

In this post I continue to explore Magda Gerber’s RIE philosophy, and I look at how relationships can influence practice. In the first post in this series, I spoke about Respect starting at birth and in the second I looked at how trust can influence practice

All humans need relationships that are secure, respectful, consistent, and trusting. The work of an early years educator, or what Gerber calls an ‘educarer’ with an emphasis on nurturing as opposed to teaching, comes with great responsibility. Babies must receive the best care. It is our role to be attuned to the needs of each baby, to know them and to be connected to them. To love them is not enough. We must be excellent at what we do and be wholeheartedly invested in our relationship with each child.

The orientation process, as babies adjust to their new environment, lays the foundation for the development of a meaningful relationship between educator and child. It is a great opportunity to build an understanding of each baby and their needs. A consistent relationship allows babies to find comfort and security, which is essential for successful and ongoing learning.

Collection of household items - Relationships - Relax, Relate, Communicate

A partnership is developed through our communication. Avoiding baby talk and speaking authentically builds respect. By acknowledging a baby’s feelings we are reassuring them that they can express their emotions. How do you feel if you are sad and someone tells you that you are fine? When a baby is dropped off and cries for their parent, they are not feeling fine. They feel sad and we should acknowledge that, ‘I know you are sad daddy has gone, it’s ok to feel sad.’ We should also acknowledge frustration, ‘I can see you want that toy, but I won’t let you (hit, bite, hurt).’

 

It takes time to build a trusting relationship, each baby is different, each time it is different. But when we have built the relationship, we start to see the baby express their interests, to engage more in their space and environment. At this point, as their need for regular physical comfort decreases, our ability to observe increases. We continue to stay close, they know we are near, but we can spend more time observing, doing less and seeing more. Do you consistently reflect on your orientation process? Does your process support the establishment of relationships?

 

Further Reading:

http://www.magdagerber.org/differences-between-a-caregiver-and-educarer---vol-i-no-2-spring-1980.html

To read the first post in this series 'Respect - It Starts at Birth', please click here

To read the second post 'Trust - their own way, their own time', please click here

1 comments Comments

One Response

  1. Carmel Brennan says:

    I just read the linked article on the magda gerber site and it’s great. Obviously we don’t want babies to feel unsupported and abandoned but at the same time we shouldn’t be so panicked by babies crying – they need to express their emotions

Leave a Reply

Please Log In to comment:

Deirdre Rogers(1) SPICE Framework(1) Traffic Lights(1) story time(1) Qualifications(1) role playing(1) Aistear(97) emotional environment(1) UN Sustainable Development Goals(1) Playdough(1) Snacks(1) Italy(1) First 5(1) Children's Research Network(1) community(4) Children(1) Department of Children and Youth Affairs(1) Names(1) maternity health(1) Treasure Chest(1) AIM(1) Loss(1) Mantra(1) Nutrition(1) baby room(1) listening(1) Touch(1) early years research(1) Interactions(1) Mayo(1) Sequins(1) Self-regulation(1) Kerry(1) Reggio Emilia(1) CIT(1) Limerick(1) Sweets(1) IGL(1) Orla Kenny(1) Motor neuron disease(1) Learning journals(1) Funding(1) TOY Programme(1) Snack Time(1) Pen green(1) development(6) Irish Childhood Bereavement Network(1) Masterclass(2) risky play(2) Employee(1) Shapes(1) Communicating(1) Performance Management(1) Love(2) MECPI(1) National Holiday(1) Academics(1) Twitter(1) Trick or treat(1) PIP(1) Pobal(1) UNCRC(1) St. Patrick's Day(1) mushrooms(1) Sustainability(3) Buddy Bench(1) Plants(1) Playschool(1) Quality(3) Meal time(1) Line-ups(1) Vietnam(1) Wilenski(1) outdoor play(6) babies(5) Emergent Curriculum(1) Ariana Pucci(1) Health(1) Cork(1) Affordability(1) Photographs(1) Maynooth(1) Kilkenny(1) outdoors(3) San Miniato(3) Wonder(1) NAEYC(1) Interests(1) ECEC(1) Child mental health(1) National Bereaved Children's Awareness Week(1) DCYA(3) Mud kitchens(1) dogs(1) preschool(2) blog(28) Traditions(2) ReCreate(2) United Nations(1) risk(2) Training(2) ICBN(1) stories(2) reading(4) Creative(1) Visitors(1) Facebook(1) documentation(2) Book Club(2) Painting(1) Wesco(1) Capable(1) science week(2) Anxiety(2) Mark Twain(1) Primary School(2) ears(1) Running(1) Magda Gerber(1) Learning Stories(7) Behaviour(3) Thanks(1) Laugh(1) Celebrate(1) Trade union(1) Annual Conference 2017(2) Rising to the Challenge(2) Iraq(1) Xbox(1) Dr. Emer Ring(1) University(1) Leprechauns(1) Thank you(1) relationships(11) Impact(1) Mealtimes(1) Workforce(1) Feeding(1) Oireachtas(1) Art(6) Sustainable(1) Exploring and Thinking(1) Settling in(1) Eritrea(1) Time Out(1) Potential(1) Care routines(1) refugees(1) Maths(4) Brain(1) Event Guide(1) The Jelly King(1) curiosity(3) Gardening(1) STEM(2) Queues(1) Flowers(1) Blocks(1) Childcare(2) animals(2) Inter-generational learning(1) Smiles(1) Minister for Children and Youth Affairs(1) Music(2) Winter(1) play(28) Afghanistan(1) Norway(2) Home Corner(1) Story(1) Sport(1) Annual Conference 2019(1) supportive environments(1) Early Learning and Care(1) National Awards 2018(2) Magic(1) Workplace Relations(2) Budget 2018(1) Síolta Quality Assurance programme(1) Inspired Practice Award(5) Vertical grouping(1) planning(1) Family wall(1) curriculum(5) food(1) grandchild(1) Educator Award - Leader in Practice(1) Community involvement(1) Weather(1) Engineers Week(2) ERASMUS+(3) pets(1) Imagination(3) Maths Week(1) transitions(9) Maynooth University(1) Snakes(1) Tuscan Approach(2) Care-giving routines(1) Mental Health(3) under 3's(3) Favouritism(1) Inclusion(1) conversations(1) Santa(2) linc(1) scéalta(24) Gratitude(1) Plastic(1) Through the looking glass(1) Jenga(1) Jillian van Turnhout(1) Performing(1) General Data Protection Regulation(1) LINC Award for Leadership in Inclusion(1) MA(1) Identity and Belonging(3) National Council for Curriculum and Assessment(1) Margy Whalley(1) Autism(2) Wendy Lee(2) Adoption(1) Halloween(2) Exit interview(1) Giraffe(2) Dance(1) Our Little Seed(1) dining experiences(1) Valentine's Day(3) Engineering(2) Supernanny(1) Mindfulness(2) RIE philosphy(1) Syria(1) educating(1) Ceremony(1) Partnership with Families Innovation Award(1) Routines(1) Arlene Forster(1) ECCE(6) Administrative Burden(1) feisty(1) Yoga(1) UN(1) routine(2) Meet the Members(1) Frosty the Snowman(1) worries(1) Irish Early Years Research & Practice Seminar 2018(1) Fabric(1) Teamwork(1) Window(1) Toby Bears Camping Trip(1) Together Old and Young Programme(1) Decisions(1) Party(1) Easter(1) Titles(1) Irish(1) Penguins(1) Childcare Barometer 2018(1) Little Buddies(1) Belonging(3) Builders(1) play stories(1) NCCA(2) Light table(1) Malaguzzi(1) College(1) Consent(1) National Forum for the Enhancement of Teaching and Learning in Higher Education(1) overhear(1) education(2) interacting(2) Arithmetic(1) Fantasy play(1) Investment(1) Research Seminar(1) Self-Esteem(1) Well-Being(6) Awards 2018(3) Educator of the Year Award(3) Exercise(1) Certificate(1) educarer(1) Arts(1) eating(1) Seas Suas(1) Early Years(1) Mathematicians(1) Kids Own(1) AsIAm(1) Technology(2) Bereavement(1) Family(1) Cork Institute of Technology(1) Albert Einstein(1) Reggio Children Network(1) Online(1) Laughter(1) San Minia(1) Culture(2) Frustrations(1) Exclusion(1) Prexit(1) Advocacy(1) Sociodramatic play(1) Scéalta Blog(73) risk assessment(1) Research Conference 2019(1) Síolta QAP(1) Role play(1) Celebrations(4) Upcycling(1) Policy and Implementation Panel(1) Games(1) Mixed age groups(2) Recycling(2) Mo Scéal(1) Identity(4) Degree(1) National Awards 2019(1) Learning Story(1) Minister Katherine Zappone(1) Educators(1) Montessori & Early Childhood Professionals Ireland(1) Environment(1) Stress(2) Early Years Educators(1) Breathing(2) Maria Montessori(1) Maternity Leave(1) Positivity(1) Appreciation(1) toddlers(3) Graduate(1) Patterns(1) Early Childhood Ireland National Awards(1) Magnavacchi(1) Storytelling(2) Mount Everest(1) Leargas(1) Pobal sector profile(1) Professionalisation(4) Map(1) Early Childhood Care and Education(1) Grief(1) books(4) science(3) Trade Unions(1) Growing up in Ireland(3) Budget 2019(2) environments(1) christmas(8) Lego(2) bonds(1) Decision Making(1) Obesity(1) Independence(1) Childhood(1) InspireMe.ie(1) Glitter(2) Valerie Gaynor(1) early childhood educator(1) budget(1) Inter-generational(1) Special Needs Assistants(1) dublin(2) Change(1) Sculptures(1) INTO(1) Policy(2) Learning Stories Award(3) Creativity(4) friendships(1) Treasure(1) learning(14) Thinking(1) Spiders(1) Access and Inclusion Model(1) Síolta(92) Montessori(2) Early Learning and Care Centres(1) Communications(1) Challenges(1) Exploring(1) Awards(2) Self Help Skills(1) Dr Mary O'Kane(1) social media(1) Rituals(1) trust(2) parents(5) Growing up Outdoors(1) Relaxation(1) communication(4) Early Childhood Ireland’s National Early Childhood Research Conference 2019(1) Time(1) Awards 2019(1) Recycle(1) EM Standing(1) GDPR(1) outdoor space(3) listen(1) Christmas Creativity(2) Empathy(1) research(5) Biting(1) Maths Week Ireland(1) Inspirational(2) Buddies(1) Socioemotional development(1) CPD(1) Workplace well-being(1) Wrapping paper(1) Confident(1) First 5 strategy(1) Cognitive development(1) Aistear Siolta Practice Guide(1) National Pyjama Day(1) Learning Story Awards(1) meals(3) respect(4) dining(1) experience(1) Nuturing interactions(1) Trigonometry(1) Siolta blog(1) Graduation(1) Craft(1) Educator - Leader in Practice Award(1) Children's Rights(1) Drawing(2) emotions(2) Aldo Fortunati(4) Scents(1) Competent(1) Shoes(1) The Lullaby Book(1) Reggio(1) memories(1) Vivian Gussin Paley(1) Engineering Ireland(1) Death(1) journey(1) EECERA 2016(1)

SIGN UP FOR BLOG UPDATES

SUBSCRIBE
Site maintained and developed by Cloud Nine