Scéalta – The Early Childhood Ireland Blog

< Back to Blog

Relationships – Relax, Relate, Communicate

By: MILICA ATANACKOVIC

Tuesday 27 September 2016

In this post I continue to explore Magda Gerber’s RIE philosophy, and I look at how relationships can influence practice. In the first post in this series, I spoke about Respect starting at birth and in the second I looked at how trust can influence practice

All humans need relationships that are secure, respectful, consistent, and trusting. The work of an early years educator, or what Gerber calls an ‘educarer’ with an emphasis on nurturing as opposed to teaching, comes with great responsibility. Babies must receive the best care. It is our role to be attuned to the needs of each baby, to know them and to be connected to them. To love them is not enough. We must be excellent at what we do and be wholeheartedly invested in our relationship with each child.

The orientation process, as babies adjust to their new environment, lays the foundation for the development of a meaningful relationship between educator and child. It is a great opportunity to build an understanding of each baby and their needs. A consistent relationship allows babies to find comfort and security, which is essential for successful and ongoing learning.

Collection of household items - Relationships - Relax, Relate, Communicate

A partnership is developed through our communication. Avoiding baby talk and speaking authentically builds respect. By acknowledging a baby’s feelings we are reassuring them that they can express their emotions. How do you feel if you are sad and someone tells you that you are fine? When a baby is dropped off and cries for their parent, they are not feeling fine. They feel sad and we should acknowledge that, ‘I know you are sad daddy has gone, it’s ok to feel sad.’ We should also acknowledge frustration, ‘I can see you want that toy, but I won’t let you (hit, bite, hurt).’

 

It takes time to build a trusting relationship, each baby is different, each time it is different. But when we have built the relationship, we start to see the baby express their interests, to engage more in their space and environment. At this point, as their need for regular physical comfort decreases, our ability to observe increases. We continue to stay close, they know we are near, but we can spend more time observing, doing less and seeing more. Do you consistently reflect on your orientation process? Does your process support the establishment of relationships?

 

Further Reading:

http://www.magdagerber.org/differences-between-a-caregiver-and-educarer---vol-i-no-2-spring-1980.html

To read the first post in this series 'Respect - It Starts at Birth', please click here

To read the second post 'Trust - their own way, their own time', please click here

1 comments Comments

One Response

  1. Carmel Brennan says:

    I just read the linked article on the magda gerber site and it’s great. Obviously we don’t want babies to feel unsupported and abandoned but at the same time we shouldn’t be so panicked by babies crying – they need to express their emotions

Leave a Reply

Please Log In to comment:

supportive environments(2) Interaction(1) eating(1) child-centred approach(1) National Childcare Scheme(1) Cork(1) Learning Story(1) ECEC(2) GoToMeeting app(1) Storytelling(6) COVID-19 Reopening(1) Death(2) parents(6) behavioural science(1) learning(19) Oireachtas(1) Mathematicians(1) Teamwork(1) Valentine's Day(3) Arithmetic(1) DCYA(4) play pods(1) Shoes(1) story time(2) Seas Suas(1) Touch(1) Builders(1) Funding(1) Traffic Lights(1) Siolta blog(8) Mental Health(3) The Lullaby Book(1) IGL(1) Playschool(1) Children(4) ICBN(1) keezy(1) Workplace well-being(1) Universal Design Guidelines(1) Christmas Creativity(2) code of professional responsibility(1) Pedagogy(1) risk assessment(1) Afghanistan(1) Minister Katherine Zappone(1) Human Resources(1) life long learning(1) Penguins(1) Budget 2019(2) transitions(10) Educator Award - Leader in Practice(1) Exit interview(1) INTO(1) Prexit(1) Norway(2) Summer(1) Anxiety(2) education(2) play therapy(1) Limerick(1) Wonder(1) Belonging(3) Trade union(1) Book Club(2) Employee(1) Your place(1) Smiles(1) stories(3) Flowers(1) Treasure Chest(1) Book Review(1) GDPR(1) curriculum(5) Communications(1) Reggio Emilia(1) Snack Time(1) awards 2020(1) Gratitude(1) MA(1) Health(2) National Bereaved Children's Awareness Week(1) Creative(1) Drawing(2) Painting(1) Universal Design(2) Engineering Ireland(1) youdoodle(1) Magic(1) Capable(1) development(8) developing motor skills(1) CIT(1) Care routines(1) Margy Whalley(1) Department of Children and Youth Affairs(2) Educator of the Year Award(3) research(6) Hand Hygiene(2) role playing(1) Access and Inclusion Model(2) learning bias(1) Trigonometry(1) Mealtimes(1) dining(1) outdoor play(6) Leargas(1) Early Childhood Care and Education(2) Degree(1) Early Learning and Care(1) Child mental health(1) racism(1) National Council for Curriculum and Assessment(1) pablo(1) memories(1) Providing Leadership to the First 5(1) Iceland(1) Rituals(1) preschool settings(1) Quality(4) Routines(2) community(5) Together Old and Young Programme(1) Intention(1) Qualifications(1) ECEC Setting(2) Engineering(3) Sustainability(3) STEM(3) Early Years Educators(3) Pen green(1) Reopening Childcare(1) Magda Gerber(1) Celebrations(4) ears(1) Sculptures(1) NCCA(3) learners(1) Learning journals(1) Games(1) The Jelly King(1) early years learning(1) Exclusion(1) Children and families(1) Opportunities(1) healthy eating policies(1) Masterclass(2) Aistear Siolta in Action(1) conference(1) Vivian Gussin Paley(1) Aistear Siolta Practice Guide(1) Partnership with Families Innovation Award(2) primary education(1) budget(1) Syria(1) Maynooth(1) Challenges(1) RTE Investigates(1) Primary School(2) Irish Childhood Bereavement Network(1) food(1) Awards 2018(3) Social Skills(1) play(34) Children's Voice(1) Nuturing interactions(1) Light table(1) Document Learning(1) Self Help Skills(1) phone apps(1) Reading Time(1) Academics(1) Obesity(1) Early Learning and Care Centres(1) Workplace Relations(3) Fabric(1) Xbox(1) Patterns(1) Covid pandemic(1) College(1) Policy(2) environments(1) Breathing(2) Interactions(2) Graduate(1) Rising to the Challenge(2) Professionalisation(5) Scéalta Book Review(1) Kerry(1) outdoor space(3) risk(2) Covid19 crisis(1) Lego(2) listening(1) Technology(3) Leadership(1) Magnavacchi(1) Inter-generational(2) Our Little Seed(1) experience(1) Children's Rights(3) overhear(1) annual conference(1) Supernanny(1) Wrapping paper(1) Favouritism(1) Dr Mary O'Kane(1) maternity health(1) Pedagogical leaders(1) Identity and Belonging(4) Meet the Members(1) play pod(1) Blocks(1) Irish Early Years Research & Practice Seminar 2018(1) Educators(2) Minister for Children and Youth Affairs(1) Competent(1) Eritrea(1) Iraq(1) lockdown(1) meals(3) Family wall(1) under 3's(3) pets(1) Playdough(1) grandchild(1) Motor neuron disease(1) Snakes(1) First 5(1) Stress(2) Orla Kenny(1) St. Patrick's Day(1) Irish(1) Sweets(1) Fee Play(1) Síolta Quality Assurance programme(1) UN Sustainable Development Goals(1) friendships(1) Leaders in Practice(1) Support(1) Arlene Forster(1) linc(1) Event Guide(1) Valerie Gaynor(1) Mixed age groups(2) Awards Night(1) social media(1) educating(1) emotional environment(2) Educator - Leader in Practice Award(1) Laughter(1) Special Needs Assistants(1) HR(1) Biting(1) Santa(2) Art(6) Maths Week Ireland(1) Giraffe(2) TOY Programme(1) emotions(2) Youtube Series(1) Adoption(1) keep in touch(1) Whole Group(1) COVID-19 crisis(1) Jillian van Turnhout(1) Nutrition(1) curiosity(3) Confidence(1) Sleep(1) EM Standing(1) iOS(1) Learning Stories(9) man up(1) Plants(1) Sustainable(1) books(4) First 5 strategy(1) Department of Education and Skills(1) Administrative Burden(1) refugees(1) RIE philosphy(1) Time(1) Confident(1) Design(1) early childhood educator(2) Queues(1) aistear blog(3) Mo Scéal(1) Study Trip(1) Sessional service(1) Dance(1) Rich Documentation(1) AsIAm(2) Grief(1) Montessori & Early Childhood Professionals Ireland(1) Child Care(1) New Appointments(1) Annual Conference 2017(2) blog(35) Reggio(1) listen(1) Winter(1) Early Years(1) UN(1) Through the looking glass(1) Digital Devices(1) Buddies(1) Plastic(1) Meal time(1) Workforce(1) Maths Week(1) Awards(2) Cognitive development(1) European Project(1) CCTV(1) Gardening(1) Yoga(1) Role play(1) Halloween(2) ECCE(7) play stories(2) DES Inspection(1) Malaguzzi(1) Nonverbal(1) movement behaviours(1) Thanks(1) Childhood(1) Thinking(1) Self-Esteem(1) Kids Own(1) Maths(5) Ceremony(1) Environment(2) Reggio Children Network(1) Shapes(1) Party(1) Budget 2020(1) gender bias(1) Pre-School Services(1) Kilkenny(1) Inspired Practice Awards(1) Laugh(1) Maria Montessori(1) TRAP(1) Inspirational(2) reading(5) Aistear(122) Culture(2) Sociodramatic play(1) research submissions(1) Early Childhood Ireland National Awards(2) Family(1) imotion(1) bonds(1) Cork Institute of Technology(1) UD(1) Line-ups(1) science(3) PIP(1) Positivity(1) National Holiday(1) United Nations(1) Snacks(1) ELC(1) risky play(2) Super Shed Stories(2) Performing(1) Self-regulation(1) Children's Research Network(1) Budget 2018(1) Infection Control(1) childcare services(1) Research Seminar(1) Love(2) purpose(1) Annual Conference 2019(1) Investment(2) Maternity Leave(1) Mud kitchens(1) Well-Being(9) Mark Twain(1) Arts(1) preschool(4) mushrooms(1) Map(1) Wendy Lee(3) Mindfulness(2) Exploring(1) Learning Story Awards(2) Scéalta Blog(99) SPICE Framework(1) San Miniato(4) Decisions(1) Names(1) Upcycling(1) SAC(1) Liz Kerrins(1) planning(1) Growing up in Ireland(3) Recycle(1) National Forum for the Enhancement of Teaching and Learning in Higher Education(1) Empathy(1) Story(1) Interests(1) ERASMUS+(3) Building Resilience(1) Dr. Emer Ring(1) Change(1) social science(1) Tuscan Approach(2) Body Language(1) Deirdre Rogers(1) toddlers(3) Equality(1) Bereavement(2) early years research(2) feisty(1) Vertical grouping(1) Brain(1) structure(1) ReCreate(2) National Early Childhood Research Conference(1) Diversity(1) Toby Bears Camping Trip(1) Visual Impairment(1) Craft(1) General Data Protection Regulation(1) Wesco(1) Training(2) interacting(2) Childcare(3) Inclusion(3) Japan(1) Jenga(1) Albert Einstein(1) COVID-19(5) Weather(1) Aldo Fortunati(4) EECERA 2016(1) Potential(1) Research and Professional Learning(1) Staff Motivation(1) Learning Stories Award(3) Awards 2019(1) Twitter(1) communication(4) dogs(1) scéalta(38) Buddy Bench(1) Research Conference 2019(1) Academic Skills(1) The Play and Learning in the Early Years(1) AIM(2) Relaxation(1) Decision Making(1) animals(2) Italy(1) UNCRC(2) Certificate(1) staying connected(1) show and tell(1) Montessori(3) documentation(4) dublin(2) Feeding(1) code of ethics(1) Thank you(1) Imagination(3) Socioemotional development(1) CPD(1) Visitors(1) Communicating(1) trust(4) Titles(1) Window(1) Easter(1) University(1) Ariana Pucci(1) Frustrations(1) Glitter(2) Care-giving routines(1) Time Out(1) value(1) Little Buddies(1) National Awards 2018(2) Creativity(4) Early Childhood Ireland(3) Sequins(1) Wilenski(1) Pobal(1) art of the relationship(1) Behaviour(3) Mantra(1) Childcare Barometer 2018(1) Affordability(1) Advocacy(1) respect(5) early life(1) children development(1) InspireMe.ie(1) Music(3) gender stereotype(1) Frosty the Snowman(1) Sport(1) Settling in(4) Emergent Curriculum(1) LINC Award for Leadership in Inclusion(2) Scents(1) Graduation(1) worries(1) National Awards 2019(1) Growing up Outdoors(1) Inter-generational learning(2) Effect of Lockdown(1) Fantasy play(1) educarer(1) Horizon 2020(1) MECPI(1) Síolta(118) outdoors(3) science week(2) bloom app(1) Elders(1) Consent(1) Recycling(2) babies(7) Running(1) Equality & Inclusion Guidelines Training(1) Appreciation(1) Mayo(1) Digital(1) Community involvement(1) Síolta QAP(1) family time(1) Maynooth University(2) Photographs(1) First 5 transitions for children award(1) Autism(4) Loss(1) Trick or treat(1) Engineers Week(2) june29(1) Facebook(1) Early Childhood Ireland’s National Early Childhood Research Conference 2019(1) Exercise(1) continual professional development(1) collaboration(1) Engagement(1) Spiders(1) Online(1) dining experiences(1) Trade Unions(1) Identity(5) Learning Journal(2) christmas(9) relationships(17) Inspections(1) NAEYC(1) Vietnam(1) Policy and Implementation Panel(1) Infectious diseases(1) apps for children(1) Participation(2) Mount Everest(1) routine(2) reopening ireland(1) Home Corner(1) National Pyjama Day(1) School Age Childcare(1) conversations(1) child-centric(1) Impact(1) Treasure(1) Performance Management(1) Celebrate(1) baby room(1) Pobal sector profile(1) Leprechauns(1) Reflective Practice(1) Exploring and Thinking(1) Inspired Practice Award(5) journey(1) Independence(1) Traditions(2) E.coli(1)

SIGN UP FOR BLOG UPDATES

SUBSCRIBE
Site maintained and developed by Cloud Nine